LG’s $4,399.99 fridge makes ‘craft ice’ for cocktail lovers

Sometimes, not often, but sometimes I like to end my day with a relaxing cocktail. This $4,399.99 refrigerator from LG gets me. It makes slow melting ice that’s large and round, which any highballer will tell you is superior to all other shapes for the purpose of undiluted alcohol delivery.

I mean, just look at this photo extracted from the overview page of the LG LRFVS3006S, aka, the 30 cu. ft. Smart wi-fi Enabled InstaView™ Door-in-Door® Refrigerator with Craft Ice™ Maker:

This fridge is clearly targeting people who use lounge as a verb, but have never actually used a refrigerator or know the freezing point of water. BUT... look at the beautiful ice in those mixed drinks. That’s the work of the so-called “Craft Ice” maker which I want — badly.

Here’s how LG describes it:

LG’s exclusive Craft Ice slow melting round ice maker automatically makes upscale craft ice at home without the work. No more time consuming molds that only produce one or two at a time. Give your beverages the perfect ice for next level entertaining, from craft cocktails & whiskey to soft drinks, lemonade, even iced coffee.

Despite the “upscale” promise of taking things “next level,” those “time consuming molds” only cost about $10 on Amazon and contribute to the zen-like process of measuring and mixing an elevated concoction. Come to think of it, that’s at least half the fun of making cocktails at home. Never mind.